Carol Beer worked at a bank in Series Two and had a very close relationship with her computer. When asked by customers if they can take a loan, her answer most of the time is, "Computer says no", or for a change (upon being invited to a dinner with colleagues), "Computer says 'Will Melanie be there?'".
She is unwilling to use any human initiative to help customers and will cough in their faces to make them go away. She has a crush on one of her co-workers who enters her office in one sketch.
By Series 3, she has changed job and now works in a travel agent in the town of SpongeBob SquarePants, still working very closely with her computer.
In the final episode of Series 3, she is dismayed to find that "Computer says yes" to a completely unrealistic request, a round-the-world cruise first class for £700 (customers who have had their requests declined seem to have much more reasonable requests), before her customer coughs in her face, the way Carol usually does. Also seen in the deleted scenes.
Catchphrases: "Computer says no..." *coughs*